We’ve spent our whole lives being trained to focus on outcomes. You study so you can get a good grade on the test. You train so you can run the marathon. You cook so you can eat. You save so you can spend. You lose weight so you can feel confident.
The message we’re taking in, internalizing, and teaching ourselves is this: It’s all worth it because of the outcome.
So no wonder it’s hard to re-program our brains when we decide we want to start enjoying life, which is lived amidst the process, rather than waiting for our reward once we’ve reached the destination.
It’s great to have goals. I love feeling inspired to work toward something. But a lesson I’ve learned about myself is that my innate tendency to feel fulfillment from the result leads to a lot of dissatisfaction, longing, and living for the future, rather than in the present.
My wellness journey has helped me in so many ways, but one of the most critical is in teaching me that life is lived in the present. In each distinct moment of time. In the journey.
I don’t know the secret to ultimate happiness, and I don’t “have it all together," but I’m pretty sure a biiiiiiiggg key is to strive for appreciation of the journey, of each little imperfect moment, and to de-emphasize the destination we seek. Because if we get there, we may (or may not) feel the elation we’re chasing in that one moment, but if we can find joy along the journey, we’ll have a lottttttt longer to live in that joy.
How can you re-frame a goal you’re working on right now or an aspect of your life to LIVE IN IT now, rather than longing for the final destination? Let me know in the comments. This is a shift I hope to help the women who join my Find Your Summer Joy group program with, because there’s no better time to truly be presence than in the Summer! If you’re wondering what else we’ll do in that group, contact me, and I’ll be happy to share!